I once attended a series of literary events in Lagos. I observed that many of the guests spoke and dressed the same way. They even ordered similar drinks. I became worried when I kept seeing the same faces repeatedly. I recognised that some types of people love the same things (like those who attend outdoor music festivals). But, I wondered how original ideas would emerge in a literary group that didn’t attract new people or different mindsets.
Many times, romance is a script based on past experiences and media consumption. It’s why a lot of people gravitate towards their type. It’s not a bad thing as it helps to manage expectations. And to be fair, very few people in life are true originals.
Problems arise when people in a relationship are running different scripts. For instance, you’re acting out a Nollywood script – deference to parents, belief that children are a heritage, fear of enemies and a desire for material things. But, your partner is Hollywood – flowers, valentine, adventurous travel and minimal family interference.
Your life together will be a tragicomedy that may or may not end well. It will be characterised by deep sacrificial compromises and pregnant silences. Typically, one person will pay a steep price to engender peace while they find their happiness someplace else. Their bodies are with you; their souls elsewhere.
[bctt tweet=”Many times, romance is a script based on past experiences & media consumption. ” username=”subomiplumptre”]