Yesterday I was thinking about how experiences shape us. Either those we’ve had or those we’ve never been privileged to have.
Take being a citizen of a first world country.
You can never understand the suffocating fear of a visa application. The feeling of not being wanted and of being seen as a leech in another man’s country. The necessity of using agents and the sheer inconvenience & humiliation of queueing at embassies and border control.
You will never know the nagging feeling that one day, you may be trapped in your country and not fulfill your potential if something goes wrong. If you are a dual citizen, you will also never quite feel the shame of being Nigerian when certain topics come up in global conversations.
If you’re poor, you instinctively know there are people you can’t talk to and events you won’t attend.
No one will invite you. There are also idiomatic expressions and cultural allusions you will never get – you didn’t watch those movies, read those books or attend those schools. And so, you keep playing catch up even when you finally have money.
When you travel abroad the first few times, it’s hard to convince your spirit that things can actually work. That people aren’t out to cheat or reject you. That the government isn’t trying to strangle your business idea.
You need to remember that NEPA will not take light and water won’t stop running. It amazes you that if you order a product and need to return it, you will be compensated without fighting for your rights. You wonder at not having to bring original copies of documents to government offices because they can be submitted online.
Sometimes, you might feel like you don’t fit into your culture.
It’s not the language, food, music or dressing. You can take those things anywhere. It’s more a mindset. You don’t like the way of life and the belief systems of the people around you. The environment keeps stifling your growth. Your defenses are permanently up.
I personally feel like the world has become very unkind in the last decade. Maybe it’s the clanging noise of social media cancel culture. Maybe it’s because things are so tough that everyone just wants to survive first before helping others. Whatever it is, I feel like I’m drowning in this perfunctory practical world. This cold evil world. It is not my culture and everything in me shrinks away from it.
Something in me desperately longs for a different world. A new culture. I no longer want to work with the people in this world or deal with its petty selfish problems. I want something more. Something great and excellent and noble. Maybe I long for “heaven” or perhaps my spirit is simply calling me to new worlds.
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For more, please read Process of Elimination.Something in me desperately longs for a different world. A new culture. I no longer want to work with the people in this world or deal with its petty selfish problems. Click To Tweet